Aita favoritism reddit. My kids love to try to make me claim a favorite.
Aita favoritism reddit Call your grandma up and make it clear that her favoritism hurt you and you will not be swayed by her displaying future favoritism. I told him I’m a bit upset and I felt he was being selfish by buying the tickets during the week I was trying to plan a vacation for us for my birthday without ever talking AITA For Wanting nothing to do with my parents now that I'm an adult due to favoritism carrying over from my childhood? Not the A-hole I think in the 4 years I've lived out from under their roof, they've come to visit myself and my fiancé 5-6 times each with some other agenda in mind like borrowing something, or my trying to get them to come I (42M) have a niece Lily (18F). Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ. >> So instead of buying a car that was within range of car fund--that means he bought an extremely expensive car to have huge car payments. Lily is the result of an affair my ex fiancee had with my brother while we were still together. this is a community like r/AmITheAsshole except unlike that subreddit here you can post interpersonal conflicts, anything that's AITA but is not allowed there even posting about Scar from the lion king and trying to convince redditors that he was not the AH. See our ~~*Best Of*~~ "Most Controversial" at /r/AITAFiltered! I ask because parents who show favoritism can really struggle to see it from the outside, and without a concrete request for some kind of change, they're likely to just feel defensive and helpless in the face of your complaint. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. It's clear who the husband's favorite is, but it's just as clear who the OP's favorite is. There are a bunch of factors that lead to his decision. 1K votes, 708 comments. from the post, it looks like OP has set both up with a college fund. My brother… So reddit, AITA? Tldr; I babysit my brother and do a large portion of the chores while my parents work. You should check out Dr Ramani on YouTube, she has a lot of resources on dealing with triangulated family dynamics like this. But there are plenty of other things that show "favoritism" towards my son. My husband has a cordial acquaintance-like relationship with his folks but knows that his sister is It's not low key. If anything, I would think I'm showing favoritism for my nephew by playing with him more to make up for the lack of verbal conversation. (These are fake names) Charlie is a loud rowdy boy and is constantly getting into things and blaming his sister for his behavior. NTA OP. 3K votes, 1. As for your wife, she is turning a blind eye to her children’s bullying behavior. My 7yo nephew can't speak as well as my 4yo niece, and I'm hard of hearing. rules: don't berate others and no pornography we have children here Posted by u/Littlehaitian007 - No votes and 49 comments AITA for cutting contact with my family over their favoritism towards my brother? Throwaway because my brother is on Reddit, and I'm on mobile, so please forgive any mistakes as English isn't my first language. I've been in Leah's life since she was 9. If anyone is showing favoritism, it’s her, when she chooses to excuse their bad behavior toward your daughter. 1. Its not just the gifts, they took me to HIS favorite restaurant, and i DIDNT even get a proper cake, instead i got a cupcake with 3 candles. For the people who sent me aggressive messages, not cool. So AITA for exposing my parents favoritism? Verdict: NTA Update AITA for exposing my parents' favoritism - 1 November 2021 I decided to go ahead and call my grandparents to accept their offer to move in. Even in my post. Update - Posted May 8th, 2023 (little over 1 month later) AITA for refusing to go on vacation until my dad and stepmom make things fair? r/AmItheAsshole • 906 They don’t drive or leave the house much except to go to the farmers market or go on walks. Chances are that neither Kara's mom nor dad have that kind of money. Why would I just not pay for everything? We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. 165K subscribers in the AmITheAngel community. I doubt the 9yr old is any more annoying than any of us might be at any given moment. They point out that Stephanie isn’t having the easiest time in life right now, and she could use some sisterly support/involvement. Meanwhile he’s raising a spoiled brat who has no sens of empathy or compassion. Before you ask, I’m not related to all of them, just my older brother (22) and my younger sister (18). We have a daughter (16 female) named Elizabeth and a daughter (25 female) named Sandy. The favoritism messed us both up. He didn’t like your opinion because he was called out for his favoritism. In many instances I found myself making excuses for his behavior. That's a good thing. During the phone… AITA is a platform for moral judgment, not medical advice. NTA for now but like others have mentioned your husband’s behavior is likely to cause lasting damage to all of the sibling relationships. Thank goodness the cousin sees the favoritism directed at her. 10 votes, 14 comments. It’s sad/ridiculous that no one else sees the favoritism though. Hello, Reddit. Kara's dad needs to step up and support her if money is an issue. During the phone call I asked them why there was monthly payments being sent to my parents. It really sounds like your mother is more concerned about cleaning the house than anything else. I was led to believe Lily was mine throughout the entire pregnancy and almost signed her birth certificate before my ex confessed out of guilt that Lily was probably my brothers. I was having a small birthday party for my son. No way. Why parents shouldn’t play favorites - Perception of favoritism linked to drug use in certain families: For families that aren’t very close to each other – so-called “disengaged” families – favoritism was strongly associated with alcohol, cigarette and drug use by less-favored children A place to satirize, crosspost from, poke fun at, and hold meta discussions on the never-ending ridiculous stories and creative writing exercises from AITA and AITA-adjacent subs, including classic tales of your local reddit heroes seeking validation. Your situation fits the "golden child" versus "scapegoat" dynamic. Having a favorite child is probably extremely common if not the norm. I believe I may be the AH because "playing favoritism" towards pets feels like a petty and ridiculous accusation, and the dog is my favorite pet too, me and him are very close, so maybe I'm equally as or even more biased. And her kids clearly have her number. Even when I used to try really hard that was never good enough either. I called him a hypocrite and told him he treated Amy better than me for years, he showed favoritism to her, opened up to her and shared with her in a way he never did with me and it wasn't okay. At least in my culture, the youngest is most often the favorite - regardless of the sex. AITA that I am driving a conflict in the family over keeping my mouth shut? My mom is always taking the side of M. idt we have enough info to know if the favoritism is ah behavior on his part, or just a My (29f) nephew, Josh (12m), is quite spoilt. Review the FAQ Before Participating Your aunt thinks her favoritism wasn't such a big deal so Jani won't really choose to be homeless. Reddit Talk Live Judging 1/13 @ 4PM EST / 9PM UTC--- 8. AITA? We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I'm mostly better off than Joe, as I'm the oldest grandson from both sides of my family, almost all of whom are just as blantant as my parents are about their favoritism. Your parents will probably come whining when you or bro have kids, whereas their favorite, your cousin, will be doing 8 to 10 - but seeing what they are doing to your cousin, you probably don't want them round your kids, anyway AITA For being petty and telling my sick mother to go ask her favorite child? Not the A-hole Growing up my (27F) mother, Kimber, made it clear that she loved my twin brother, Jack, more than me and she didn’t like having a daughter. I find it even more unfair that because I’m not allowed to use the car much. He also is quite mean to his younger sister because his parents never believe her when she tells him what he's done to her stuff. My middle child is my favorite for being true to who she is, tomboy all the way, rather go rebuild an engine or train a horse than be girly. I AM NOT THE OP. As I left, though, I told her that I know her favorite is my sister and that I'm her least favorite. 15. She says that I'm showing favoritism. Some background information. op could be showing favoritism towards one child at least partially in reaction to mom showing favoritism towards the other. Mom would praise me when I did something well and ignore my sister, and the rest of the family would tear me down and praise my sister. I told him he then called me selfish for telling him how it made me feel. If they needed help, they should show you why they deserve the help, and yet they still failed to show an unbiased perspective towards you. And punished his daughter when she pointed it out. I'll pull up a picture in the next 20 seconds on my phone. Your mother sounds like a narcissist; reading about how to cope with a narcissistic parent may be helpful for you!! My Dad was a narcissist (like his mother) and my sister was always his favorite. I've always been interacted with in a way where my simple existence is just not good enough. I (40F) have four siblings. I 19f have an older sister with two kids. I’ll admit I have gotten in trouble with it (legally) and have lost my parents trust for the stuff I’ve done but I’m working to get it back. The context of this post is such a small piece of the total relationship between us all. A place to satirize, crosspost from, poke fun at, and hold meta discussions on… Thank you, I really needed to hear it like this. Both my SIL and Daughter are… It doesnt really sound like favoritism. They are manipulating her with their ridiculous claims of favoritism. You have nothing to apologize for. Not "interacting", but verbal talking. She started crying, and my dad walked in, immediately calling me an asshole for hurting her feelings. I can't help but wonder what sort of treatment the husband was hoping to offset by giving his first born a little extra love to make up for the lack of care (and yes, even disdain) the OP clearly has for her. <<We explained that they each have a set amount of money that we have put away for future schooling as well as a car fund. I(34F) work at a small family plumbing company that is run by my dad. Just saying, in case you never met the favorite kid who feels that way? But, NTA. I (F17) have a younger sister, Emily (F16) Even though they don’t say it explicitly, Emily is clearly my parents’ favourite child. Me and my two brothers (one is 22, two of us are 21) have been on the other side of US for the majority of 2023 and didn't think we were going to be there for the party, but plans shifted and we ended up arriving home last Wednesday. Yeah I mean one instance does not dictate favoritism, the 16 year old just happened to start driving when grandpa wanted a new car. I'm a 25-year-old male, and my younger brother is 20. Taking the posts seriously is heavily discouraged. YESSSS, exactly. You're really just creating balance in an imbalanced world. AITA? TL:DR: accused my parents of favoritism cause they buy my sister a lot of stuff but don’t get me some clothes when I ask after 2+ years. While we were at my parents' house… Most of his siblings don't talk to him and I 100% believe it's because of his mom's favoritism like I said. But the big question is, do you want your daughters to see the favoritism of their cousins? NTA for expressing your opinion about her favoritism, even providing examples of it. Tell her you've uninvited your brother from your wedding, and if she wants to disinvite herself then you want to know soon. 12K votes, 3. Its always been really obvious to me that he's the favorite child and my parents treat him differently to me. true. Even though I excelled academically and had a stronger reputation for good and responsible behavior at school and among the people my family socialize with. I (30M) i’ve never really had a good relationship with my parents (59M and 58F). I get that you see yourself in H more, because genetics are a factor in shared interests, and even taking that aside it's easier to bond with a kid you share something with, but at the same time as an adoptive parent you can't show preference to one kid over the others. Told him he is a bad parent and calling out to spend more equal time/money on his daughter. AITA for showing “favoritism” for my niece and nephew? My (under age female) niece Lia (4F) and nephew Liam (8M) have, in my opinion, a terrible mother (Izzy). All my attempts at reasonable discussion resulted in conflicts and name calling, so I sometimes feel like the A for breaking apart the family over this. It sounds like you really need to get this off your chest and have a conversation with the family about this, however I think the way you handled it makes you an AH as well. My kids love to try to make me claim a favorite. NTA OP, your parents wove a tangled web, and now they are caught in it. In this aspect, it may be that I show a bit more "favoritism" towards my daughter. You just make Lena feel special too. 2K comments. I (19M) have three older siblings - (32F), (25M) and (24F). You're still using your parents t Here's another thought - OP should continue to pay and continue to make plentiful references to 'the favorite child'. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. Uninvite your brother from the wedding. His blatant favoritism to his youngest is probably partially why the oldest two aren’t close to her. He told me I don't have the right to rub my favoritism of grandpa in his face. Maybe tell your mom you know she loves her sister and this must be difficult for Dec 18, 2023 · Reddit AITA can't believe this coddling mom's uneven estate plan and the "emotionally incestuous relationship" she has with one son. OP is specifically endorsing it. 6K comments. They hate that others are ignored or feel left out. My mother made me her favorite and the whole family decided to "correct" this and make my sister their favorite. Sometimes being the favorite is a burden for a child. I have had it with my parents' favoritism towards my older sister, and my jealousy may make me an asshole. My niece, Eliza who is 9 and my nephew Charlie, who is 4. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! he straight up pulled out of your wedding and tried to hold money over you so the person who bullied you, clearly showing outright preference and favoritism. My brother is 14 and I'm 15. Stick to your brother & cousin, since they’re the only real support you have. I went to countless therapy sessions with her, and cemetery with her, year after year, completely supportive of her. So my original AITA was about showing favoritism for my daughter and financially hurting my son. Guess Lexi is OP's favorite too. It was interesting for me. Then, yesterday she finally told me that she appreciates me while we were running errands and we had some conversations about things that my supposed friends did to me when I was younger and I think she realized how delicate I can be about this AITA for "calling out" my husband's favoritism ? Asshole My husband Tom (37m) and I (33f) have been married for 7 years and we have 2 kids, Sammy 3, Nora 5, he was married before me and had a son (Teddy) who passed on from chronic illness at 4. NTA. His family knew it was lopsided and favoritism, and called him for approval of the favoritism. But that doesn't change the fact that the daughter who is in line to inherit that house doesn't want to live there with Kara, and apparently has non-petty reasons for that wish. You don't neglect the other kids. Oh man, this is a hard AITA to call for me. I'm fully prepared to take my judgment so bring it on. You are the asshole for going to your mother rather than directly to your brother so that he could clarify for himself. She does what is necessary and works late shifts at her job but won’t get quality time with her kids. He does bare some blame for not seeing how wrong this is til this day. And I do know that he is lying to me what he needs the money for, his reasons are always ridiculous, but I also do know that he lives in a computer club and that he literately has only one smelly pair of socks, he either lost or sold all his belongings, so when he asks for “emergencies” - I think that it’s just to cover his needs, like . He's younger and was the favorite. Exactly the moment Ariel chose to rub it in her sisters faces that she was the favorite, she went from the golden child (not every golden child wants to be the favorite and is also damaging like some of OP friends say) to the golden brat who is 20 years old and relishes in her favoritism and activity blames the favoritism on her sisters because They know favoritism is bad, but they don’t view themselves as bad people so they won’t admit they’re guilty of doing it. The comments went way far from that topic. pageants start very young, so its possible that mom was only showing attention to the one that was in them very early on, and that's how op and his other daughter became close. He is the owner. I called my partner out on playing favorite with his son. After seeing my interactions with my granddaughter, my oldest has accused me of favoritism. Presuming this is being faithfully presented, your parents are AH for blatant favoritism, and especially for continuing that favoritism in their grandparenting. The life and death consequences of many medical conflicts are well outside of Reddit's paygrade. and is starting to lie and hide the money she spends on ny sister. AITA for cutting contact with my family over their favoritism towards my brother? Throwaway because my brother is on Reddit, and I'm on mobile, so please forgive any mistakes as English isn't my first language. We do not allow posts where the central conflict is transmitting or contracting any communicable disease, or undergoing any kind of medical procedure. They got really mad and me and told me that I wasn’t getting clothes even if I begged them. No favoritism or making children feel like shit on Christmas, the holiday everyone shills as being fueled by generosity. You are NTA. 1 Update - Medium Original - Posted March 28th, 2023 . Update to Original Post . Memes allowed, shitposts only on weekends. My favorite response to someone saying dumb nonsense like "anyone can draw a picture" is just bet. Reddit AITA: Mom's Uneven Inheritance Shows Favoritism 2020-03-21 11:07:49 AITA for showing blatant favoritism towards one aunt's children over another aunt's? 2020-03-22 18:14:30 AITA for refusing to give my cousin their wedding gift after they cancelled their wedding? HOWEVER, I do want to point out a couple things: every time I assume something at work, I get bit in ass. My dad will help my sister whenever she needs it and when I ask for his help he tells me to F off and that he has hated me since I came into his life… After the night, on the way back from the "party which was just a get-together of family members" I had asked them why they clearly favoured my brother over me. You need to re exam your relationship with him because he is an asshole and I'm sorry about that AITA that I am driving a conflict in the family over keeping my mouth shut? My mom is always taking the side of M. And yes, I know of similar situations outside of Reddit! Jill is my parent's favorite, because they've always wanted a daughter, while Joe is their scapegoat, because I guess he's the bonus baby they never actually asked for. His room is twice the size of mine, he gets money to go out with his friends and eat but if I want to go out I have to use money I saved from my birthday or Christmas or when grandma visits, I get in trouble for things he doesn't get in trouble for, there's OP, please keep this warning in mind! There are too many posts on this forum and on other ones about parents who’ve gone bankrupt due to funding their children’s lifestyles and then begged one of their self-sufficient children to help them out. She didnt yell at your sister, because your sister was helping clean the house and move that agenda along. If OP stops paying then his parents will come up with a fake apology (because it's all about the money). but they'll come to you to get some help later coz your sister won't give a penny!!! And you have prooved that you are very capable without their help So my ptv: leave them (best moment will be if/when they threaten you to kick you out: say ok!) See, the younger sister's kids got more (succulents AND clothing!) while the older sister's kids only got one thing! So it's tooooootally fine. Outwardly it may be perceived as favoritism, but it may not be. Many are saying that I am wrong to ban Stephanie from the wedding, because in a way she is also a victim of our parents’ favoritism. Yesterday was my sister's (25F) engagement party. I can understand why they’re proud of Emily: she is a straight A student, has the lead roles in student theatre, swims competitively, is popular at school, and very, very good looking. That’s the best part of this. They always went to their school events but not mine. Firstly, I want to highlight that I do not think I'm entitled to my parents' money and I would never bring this up with them. A place to satirize, crosspost from, poke fun at, and hold meta discussions on the never-ending ridiculous stories and creative writing exercises from AITA and AITA-adjacent subs, including classic tales of your local reddit heroes seeking validation. As a result, sadly Josh has grown a little entitled. Nothing good will come out a relationship with them. Openly showing favoritism is cruel. My grandma was the same way with my aunt’s husband being her favorite over her 2 sons (my Dad and my uncle) for years until one day she turned on him. He approved the favoritism, presumably, if his other daughter is upset about it. I feel bad because I’ve done this in the past, but this time I don’t feel like I’m in the wrong. I first told my parents my feelings, calmly. AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. OP's sister is clearly the favorite and they obviously want more rom OP - probably money too and I agree 100% OP needs to stay away and go NC with all of them for good. I decided to go ahead and call my grandparents to accept their offer to move in. I think having a weird story about your first car is just as common as "my parents bought me one" in America. My youngest is my favorite because he is determined, driven, creative. WIth the favoritism for your brother they have failed to neglect your needs. So than I accused them of favoritism. 25 votes, 10 comments. My hubs has gone through something similar with his parents and I will tell you this: favoritism hurts both children. You draw it, well enough that people assume you went to art school. My brother and I are both the same sex. My sister says it’s not favoritism because she’s buying a good chunk of the car and my parents paid for my car. So, AITA for calling out the favoritism in my family? Edit 1: my sister and I were adopted at 4 years old. Funnily enough I don’t really blame my dad much, though I’ll admit he wasn’t a great dad, he didn’t know much about anything because I didn’t wanna stress him out, he worked a lot because he was supporting all of us while my parents being separated and him still having to pay for his own place as well as ours was hard on him, he was very loving, loved to cook with me and watch movies I34m have an older sister Tina37 Tina had extreme fertility issues, suffered through many miscarriages, and endured a premature stillborn. My parents favoritism wasn't even subtle. We decided on his favorite pizza place. Anyways, I blew up on her and said I was sick and tired of the blatant favoritism in this family and that I couldn’t wait to turn eighteen and leave this hellhole forever. Throwaway account - names have been changed I (50 male) have 2 children with my wife Hillary (45 female ). Did I over react for accusing them of favoritism. My favorite saying regarding lies is: It's easier to remember what you tell people if you only tell the truth. growing up, they showed a lot of favoritism towards my younger brother and often showed that they did not care about my feelings. The cousin sees it & defends OP. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. 31K votes, 1K comments. Between the five of us, my parents have nine grandchildren. She went off at me at how I’m so used to doing this and I wasn’t even there to support her during labor and how scared she was. I would suggest therapy. Subreddit Announcements Happy Anniversary, AITA! Follow the link above to learn more Apr 4, 2023 · One dad on the AITA Reddit won't empty his daughter's hobby rooms so his son and grandson have a place to live, “The favoritism is insane lol,” one person wrote. She does not understand how upset Jani really is since she can't acknowledge to herself how impactful her behavior is. I didn’t know how to feel about this so I figured I’d ask strangers on the internet because why not? I’m 21m and I am one out of 10 kids in my family. “Obviously YTA. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Your his wife, kids live under your roof as well, and you have the right to your opinion. If they do not acknowledge their favoritism, they will never help you. My eldest is my favorite for her soft heart and caring nature. On top of that they raised us in a very strict religious environment. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. So I tell them the truth. Some questions to be addressed. Originally posted by u/throwRA_saveyodalla in r/AmItheAsshole. This AITA is just to help me make peace with myself - if I'm voted TA, I'll work on accepting that my perception of the situation isn't in sync with reality and I may be more entitled than I AITA giving heirloom necklace to my stepdaughter I have a stepdaughter Leah (20) and a biological daughter Sienna (16). I did it spontaniously and I don't know why. This favoritism has not changed and has amplified with my parent's favorite daughter in law and grandchild. But to preface, we haven’t always been the wealthiest family. My parents agreed to give us each an allowance, but I was refused mine since my room had bird feathers on the floor and he was given extra. His parents, my brother and SIL show blatant favoritism towards him over his younger sister Lou(9f). Even though my husband knew this he dropped $400 on concert tickets to see his favorite band the day before my birthday and in the middle of the week off I had requested. You know there is obvious favoritism of your brother from a young age that has continued into adulthood and extended to all of the grandchildren. So ~maybe~ some clarification would be helpful when you have time off + bereavement, also the new(ish) employee may have had an agreement regarding her husband when she was hired. Your husband sees it, other family members have mentioned it too but should be calling out your mother. gkeh nds cwmxy uew ydorhlk pvr ojbm eekzt ggx acqweg jjnyyyky gahjfqr htvznior znzmkdc afgtukd